TWEENS
As a parent of a tween, almost teen, I realize that I am not as young as I may feel. Everything my child does, says or wants is completely foreign to me. In my younger days I was always rebelling against the system, but I’m starting to believe that I may now be “The System.” I may want my daughter to dress in something like a simple polo style dress whereas she wants to dress in some skinny neon jeans with a Mohawk on her head and sneakers. It is so easy for us to forget all the things we went through in our younger days. I have to remind myself that I too was a tomboy until I graduated from high school.
When your child is young they can’t get enough of you, they stick to you like glue. They are very content spending all day and night by your side. Somewhere around the age of 10 yrs old parents go from being their best friend to being the fuzz or the opposition. I really do miss that mini-me that enjoyed everything I did, didn’t mind dressing alike and spending countless hours together. But, kids need time and space to develop into their own person. As much as I would like to grab my daughter by the arm and tell her that she is going to play Barbie’s with me whether she likes it or not, I know that I am better off conforming to the new her and learning how to enjoy things like the Wii and Playstation.
The Centers for Disease control reports that suicide is the third leading cause of death of people aged 15 to 24 and the fourth leading cause of death for children between the ages of 10 and 14. As much as you miss that little person who you had so much control over its important to let your child do what makes them happy (to a reasonable extent of course). Child and parent may not see eye to eye when it comes to things like wardrobe, music and TV shows but honestly there are more important things to bump heads on, like keeping up good grades, staying away from drugs and alcohol and so on.
My daughter often tells me that I don’t let her express herself through music because I refuse to listen to anything other than “my” playlist in the car. She can express herself all she wants with her headphones. I may not oppose the music, but that doesn’t mean that I have to embrace it.
When you are a new parent, people always tell you that it gets easier every day but I still haven’t gotten to that point where I think, “This is easy.” I am currently dreading the day that I have to have the birds and the bees conversation with her, which I know is RIGHT around the corner. For the last few years I’ve just told her that boys stink and to stay far away from them. My daughter isn’t technically a teen yet but I know that won’t work much longer, especially when she finds out that they actually smell pretty darn good.
Nowadays, I find myself repeating the same phrase my parents once told me, “Just wait until you have kids.” Hahaha, I’ve become my mother. I’m ok with that because I now realize that she was and still is pretty darn cool.
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I know what you mean. I use to have a mini me, but now he is a gown man (have him tell it). I give advice and try to point him in the right direction, but the turth is I just hope that he does not make all the mistakes I did. And if case you were wondering… My mom is also pretty darn cool.