You have decided to take the plunge and start dating again.  Yes, you are a single mom whether by divorce, choice, widowed or the ever popular loser boyfriend.  No matter how you got there you are now a single mom.

Getting back out into the dating scene can be a bit intimidating.  Things have definitely changed;  you are a parent now and your priorities have changed.

Here are some  important tips you should know before you get back out there and start dating again.

1.  Set Rules – Set rules for yourself and know what you want.  Stick to them the best you can.  You are a parent so things are not like before.

2.  Take Things Slow – Do not make the first or second guy the instant boyfriend, start playing house and have him pick up Timmy Jr. from soccer.  It is very okay to be picky and take your time to play the field a bit.

3.  Casual Dating or Serious Relationship – Are you just casually dating or do you want something serious?  My advice is casual date with serious intent.  I am casual dating but open for something more if they could be right for me and my child.

4.  Do not Be Desperate – Have standards and do not be too eager.  I know it’s been a long time and you can easily get lost in the excitement.  Sadly that could mean a lot of dateless nights but it ‘s not really that awful because you are a parent first and a busy one at that.  Be patient.  When the right one comes along you’ll know.

5.  No Need For Kid Introduction – You do not have to introduce your date to your kids.  In fact they do not even have to know.  I keep my dating private and away from my son the best I can.  He is five and does not need to know the details, just that mommy is going out with a friend.  If you have older kids it is then pretty impossible to hide so talk to them about you dating again and help them understand and feel secure.  Let them know they are always first in your life.

6.  Do Not Take the Kids on a Date – You meet a fellow single dad, wonderful.  Then ideas of your kids and his kids playing in the park together on a sunny Sunday seems ideal, but NO!  Not yet at least.  What if the relationship does not work out?  Not only are you crushed but your child could be too.  They have lost a playmate friend and even an adult one if they were really starting to like the guy.  The idea is tempting; trust me.  This slides right into the next thing you should know.

7.  Make Sure He is the One Before Introduction – Make sure he is the one before you introduce him to the kids.  Take time and thought for you are not only dating for you, you are dating for your kids too.

8.  Date According to your Kids – Once again you are dating not only for you, but for your kids too if you are planning for a serious relationship.  Ask yourself  if this person is right for you and your child.

9.  Keep Your Children First – Always make sure your kids are first before the man.  As a parent we always put our needs on the back burner.  Our kids come first.  Don’t get so caught up in the romance that you forget them.

10.  Learn Compromise – While you may have made some rules and standards for yourself, love never plays by the rules.  So compromise sometimes but only if it feels right.