Frustration and parenthood seem to go hand in hand.  With financial concerns mounting from the economic climate and less and less downtime, adults are consistently facing the toll that stress takes on us both physically and mentally.  Patience is truly becoming a limited resource.

This was evident on my recent trip to a children’s museum.  Frustration was a vibe that filled the air.  I witnessed parents getting irritated when photo opportunities were missed because kids wouldn’t cooperate.  Frustrated parents were trying to corral their kids to the next exhibit because, “we have to have time to see it all.”  I had my own bout of frustration when my son spun into a tantrum because he changed his mind about his take-home goody as the museum was closing.

What steps will lead me toward a breezier life?  Here is how I am refocusing my efforts to build up my patience foundation and leave the frustrations behind.

Choices, choices.  Nobody likes to be constantly told what to do – especially a 3-year-old.  After a morning tantrum because my son didn’t like his shirt, I was reminded by his day care assistant of a tip from Parenting 101.  Let him choose.  I may love that button-down plaid shirt and khaki shorts, but is it worth it to force my son to wear it?  On that particular day I thought I needed to be the “strong” parent, which takes me to my next point.

Pick your battles.  As parents, we always want to be right and “win” the daily struggles we face with our kids as we are their guides in life.  But, my new mantra is “you can’t win them all.”  Some things just aren’t worth fighting over, such as forcing my son to wear a shirt.  Every interaction does not need to be a lesson in the making or a reminder that I am the parent and what I say goes.  Sure, there is important stuff that I won’t compromise on, but clothing is not one of them.  My son needs to “win” sometimes to help him develop and grow.

This too shall pass.   For months now, my mornings have been filled with frustration as my son is going through the, “I don’t want you to leave me at day care” phase. Some days are better than others, but those rough ones launch the day on a less-than-happy note.  After feeling beat down by this exhausting morning process, I am remembering that this is just a phase.  All things come to an end, good and bad, and that has helped me weather this particular storm.

Stop and smell the roses.  A former co-worker constantly reminded me how fast time goes.  She has three grown sons who are all off on their own.  When I would complain about something my son did, she would emphasize how I should slow down and revel in this time of my parenting life as my son won’t want to cuddle or cling to me forever.  Living in the moment is an excellent way to let go of life’s frustrations.

Despite my efforts, frustration will bubble up and that’s ok.  I know I will be a better parent – and wife – if I can learn, little by little, to let things go.