Their new album “STRONG” featuring “The World Is Changing” was released overseas, www.vagabondmusiconline.com/fr_strong.cfm .  It reached and stayed for several weeks on Japan’s Top 10 MTV International.

(Singer, dancer and choreographer, Eshe, Interview with Flaimahmy, July 22, 2010)

FM:  I understand that Eshe means life in Swahili.  Can you tell us how you got your name?

E:  Actually it does and my whole name is Montsho Eshe; you can say it “Mont sho Es shay” and it means black life.  It’s a really fun story.  My sister was pregnant with my nephew at the time the group was about to release a record and everybody in the group had all of these cool names outside of their real names, their government names.  I was looking for an African name for my nephew in this African book and I ran across that name, Eshe, and I loved it.  I was like ’wow’ this describes me because I’m very energetic and a bubbly person so I liked the name.  It was as simple as that.

FM:  As a child did you dream of being a writer, musician and choreographer?

E:  Actually, I wanted to be a lawyer and I wanted to dance for Alvin Ailey.  That’s what I wanted to do.  I grew up in the arts.  My mother owned a dance school for over thrity-five years.  I’ve been dancing since I was two years old and I’m thirty-five now.  I taught my first dance class when I was fourteen.  I think I choreographed my first piece when I was fifteen or sixteen.  It was to Prince when he did the Batman soundtrack, that song that he had on the soundtrack.  That was my first piece.

I’ve always loved to dance; I’ve always loved music.  Truly, I really thought I was going to be a lawyer and dance with Alvin Ailey.  I kind of fell into the music thing.  My sister was into it heavily because I’m the youngest.  How I got in the group, actually it was my sister’s audition and she didn’t want to do it and she passed it on to me because she was doing some other work with James Brown and other artists at that time.  So, she was like, “You want the audition?”  I was like, “Sure.”

I just went in and auditioned for fun; I was thirteen years old when I auditioned for Arrested Development.

FM:  Wow.  How did your parents feel about you auditioning so young for a major group?

E:  This was in the eighties so the group was at its beginning stages.  There was actually just Speech and the other co-founder who was Headliner; it was just the two of them and then I came into the flow.  My mom was extremely supportive because again she was a woman of the arts who owned her own dance school so she said, “If this is what you really want to do as long as you stay focused in school and be good in school and don’t get in trouble, you can do it.”  I was like, “Ok.”  It was just fun for me.  My dad lived in the house but he never was really engaged in what we were doing.  It was more so my mom.  I kind of looked to her for direction.

FM:  You have a seven year old daughter.  Are you and her dad conservative parents or liberal parents?  What’s your parenting style?

E:  That’s a great question.  I’m saved and I’m a Christian and I try to live a Holy life.  I try my best.  I’m not perfect.  You know honestly I don’t let her listen to certain music because I don’t listen to it.  No cursing around her, I don’t do that.  No drinking,  No smoking.  None of that.  I try to raise her right and keep her sheltered from some things but not to the point where she’s shellshocked when she’s in the world.  I take her out with me on the road.  She’s home schooled.   She’s a very smart young lady.  She takes gymnastics.  I teach her dance.  She’s very active in church.  She loves going to church.  She loves God and she loves learning.  She’s just a happy child.  Her lifestyle is different from other kids her age, number one, because of what I do for a living and since she was two months she’s been touring.  Her first trip was Hawaii and she went to Europe when she was two and a half going on three.  She travels with me all the time.  My mother and I are very very close so it’s really the three of us always together.

When I’m out of town and I can’t bring them because sometimes they come on the road with me, my mother keeps her for me and watches her.  There are other family members who help as well but it is mainly my mom.  She’s with me pretty much all the time.   Her dad is very supportive of her as well.  I try to be open but she’s a little firecracker.

FM:  Is your daughter interested in performing?

E:  Oh yeah.  Actually, she’s been in two of our videos.  She has already done a pilot for a reality tv show about talented young kids in agencies.  I keep her active at church so she does her speeches and dances.  I don’t push her to do anything that she doesn’t want to do but it’s funny how a lot of the stuff that she has done she didn’t even audition for, people just asked, “Can she be a part of this?”   I’m like, “sure” and I ask her does she want to do it and she says yes.  You know it’s interesting how things have just kind of fallen into her lap.  I tell her all the time that she’s so great and she is fearfully and wonderfully made and she’s blessed.  She has such a spirit of success on her and prosperity and love.  She just has such a good heart as a kid.  She has kind of an old soul too.  She’s truly a blessed child.

FM:    Awesome.  Now Arrested Development has kicked off its U.S. and Canadian tour.  You performed at the Tom Joyner Cruise and  The Essence Music Festival in New Orleans recently.  You’ve also performed in Dubai.  So few Americans know anything about Dubai.  How did you prepare for that performance and how was the experience?

E:  We did what we normally do.  You know, just our regular show.  We didn’t know what to expect because we hadn’t been to Dubai.  A lot of people had told us how beautiful it was and how strict it was over there.  When we got there, because it is a very strict Muslim country, a lot of people were covered up and you definitely always want to respect the culture whereever you go, that part was very interesting just seeing the culture…the dress style.  People kind of look at you a little strange.

It was beautiful.  I actually love it there.  It was hot, whoooh as I don’t know what, but it’s really really hot there.  I was like, “I’m from the south but I’ve never felt heat like this.”  It was beautiful.  The people really received us.  Honestly, a lot of the shows, it was a lot of Americans there and people from all over the world because of a lot of people over there teaching English or working because it is such a very rich place .  There is a lot of construction and building going on.  It’s a lot of Americans in Dubai, you would be surprised, a lot.

FM:  I want to go to Dubai one day definitely.

E:  You should go; it’s beautiful.  They have huge malls.  They have a mall that has an actual ski resort in it and it’s real snow in the middle of the desert.  Isn’t that amazing?  They have mosques in their malls so that at a certain time you hear like a bell ring and people then go and pray in the malls.   It’s deep.  It’s a beautiful place.  We’ve been there two or three times.

FM:  You are writer and choreographer for Arrested Development’s new album entitled, STRONG.  That’s a “strong” position for a woman in an industry still dominated by men.  How has the industry changed in your opinion?

E:  Well, you know, as they say, it is what it is.  When I first got in of course I was only thirteen.  When we came out I was sixteen.  I was still very much a kid.  Coming into something like this that is such an adult business you have to grow up really quick and a lot of things you are not prepared for.  You learn by trial and error.  This is a very male dominated business.  It’s unfortunate sometimes.  I was speaking with a friend of mine the other day and I was saying in this business a lot of times it is very sad that people say, ”I want to do this with you, I want to work with you, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah” and really at the end of the day what they are trying to do is what they were doing at the beginning of the day, they are just trying to date you or connect with you on another level other than business.

It’s unfortunate because I feel like a lot of times a lot of great female artists are overlooked for that reason because they are not going to give in to selling their soul just to get a record deal.  You hear about that so much.  That part saddens me.  It’s not everybody in the industry but it does happen and I think honestly not just in music but that happens in the world.  A lot of people do things to climb up the ladder of success which is very unfortunate.

When I first got into it, I never knew what a groupie was or any of that and just seeing it from that perspective and being on the road and seeing that and just being a young girl in the business and not knowing a lot of things from a business aspect, learning by trial and error, it was heartbreaking.  Honestly, for a while I stepped away from the music industry for like two years.  I didn’t want anything to do with it… at all…period.

It was funny because during that time I really heavily got into my Word and into God and in the sense of direction for my life.  Then God sent me back on out and people kept calling me and asking me if I could choreograph this and can you do this and can you do that.  Part of the reason was that I was just heartbroken by how people treat one another.  I’m one of those people who trys to believe in the good things versus the negative things in people or situations.  It was heartbreaking for it to continuously keep going on and on and on.

I’ve seen so many young girls be taken by the industry because of that and they don’t want anything to do with it because of how you get treated by a lot of the males in this industry.  It’s really sad.  It’s really sad.

FM:  You’ve stated that your goal is to be a legend in print, film and music?  Do you feel as though you are on target?

E:  Oh yeah, definitely.  I’m right where God wants me to be.  You know throughout the years I’ve been through a lot in my life.  A lot.  But, you know it’s amazing because  all those experiences build character, they sharpen your character and I praise God for them.  They have made me the person I am today.  Everyday my goal is to be a better person and to do what God wants me to do.  I feel like I am in that place.  I’m more seasoned now.  I’m more wise, more grounded and I’m excited about the future that is in store for me.

It’s beyond what I do.  Let me say this.  If I don’t hit the mark of God’s purpose for me, then a nation is lost because under me it’s people that I’m supposed to touch, it’s people that I’m supposed to meet, it’s relationships that are supposed to develop and every situation that comes about is for a season, a reason or a lifetime.  It’s a reciprocal effect.  You get something from them, they get something from you whether it just be encouragement or you’re speaking something into their life or being positive or loving or something.

If I’m not where I am supposed to be then a whole nation of people will be lost.  I try to really stay in line with the Creator, in like, “Where do you want me to be?  Where do you want me to go?”   I feel like I’m definitely in the right place.

FM:  You are Director of Performing Arts Ministry at Solomon’s Porch Ministries in Decatur, GA.  What is your core teaching in this ministry?

E:  Oh, man.  My core teaching in my dance ministry is to build strong Christians as well as dancers so not only are you teaching people how to dance but you’re being mother, you’re being sister, you’re being friend, you’re being counselor, you’re being mentor because they are watching your lifestyle.  A lot of times when we’re having rehearsals they may come in and get on issues of home and you have to deal with that before you can even move forth to the dance aspect of it.

It’s a blessing because I’ve been teaching a long long time and a lot of the kids have been with me since they were babies and they are getting ready to go off to college.  We just did a dance conference at my church and a dance concert last Sunday.  It really blessed my heart because people who attended have seen my kids dance for years.  They were saying that something happened, something shifted with them, because they had never seen them dance like that and give their all.  Just like my mother taught me, these are skills that they can take with them the rest of their life.  They can always teach somebody how to dance and make a living off of that and sew into some other young person’s life.

For me, the core is to build great people and to let my life be an example.  Sometimes, you definitely fall short; I definitely fall short.  I try to be a great example for those kids because they are like my kids and I love them very very much.

FM:  We consider you to be a Fly Mommy.  Tell us in your own words what makes you a Fly Mommy.

E:  Oooh…ok…What makes me a Fly Mommy?  That I love my daughter.  That there is nothing that I would not do for her.  That I am there for her.  That I support her.  That I respect her.  That I have been nurturing the gift that God has given her.  That I try to be the best example I can be.  That I had a great mom to follow.  Also, on the flip side of that I try to be cute, I tell my daughter,  “When you grow up your friends are going to be like dang, that’s your mom, I thought that was your sister because you’re going to have a really cute young fly mom so just get used to it.”  So she’s like, “Ok, mommy.”   I just think character makes you a Fly Mom.  I try to be the best for her and she is so awesome.

Anderson, age 2 of Atlanta, Georgia.

Congratulations Anderson you are our $1,000 prize winner!

Summer Picnic-  Try packing a fun picnic lunch and heading to a local park for the day.

Day at the Beach- Families can really have a fun weekend if it’s spent at the beach!  It’s a chance for you to catch up on that tan as well.

Weekend Trip-  Try booking a quick little trip with your family to an indoor water park which includes room and board.

Ice Cream- Take your family out for an ice cream or better yet try making your own.  This makes for some fun and quality time together.

Library visit- Take a family field trip to the library.  If possible, sign your kids up for a summer reading program.

Movie night- Take your kids to the movies or better yet, have your own family movie night.  Make your own snacks like popcorn.

Family bike rides- On a nice weekend evening go for a leisurely bike ride through your neighborhood or local state park.

Summer Carnivals-If you know of any summer carnivals in town for the weekend!  This will surely be a hit with your kids.

Weekends come and go so very quickly and kids grow so quickly.  Don’t let those precious times slip by.

For more weekend fun ideas go to familyfun.com.

According to Apples 4 the Teacher, here are just a few of those exciting summer season books packed with excitement, fun and sure to get those creative juices flowing:

A Kid’s Summer Ecojournal: With Nature Activities for Exploring the Season by Toni Albert and Margaret Brandt (Illustrator)- This is a journal filled with nature activities for kids from collecting insects to growing a sunflower. This summer season filled book will keep a child busy while being educational and fun.  Ages 3+

Crafts to Make in the Summer by Kathy Ross- This summer fun activity book is bursting at the seams with exciting summer projects (firecracker finger puppet) for all ages to enjoy.

Cooking on a Stick: Campfire Recipes for Kids by Fran Lee, Linda White- Whether your family is taking a camping trip or letting your child camp out in the yard for fun, this book guides you on the highlights of campfire cooking along with recipes.

Summer Fun!: 60 Activities for a Kid-Perfect Summer by Susan Williamson (Editor), Michael P. Cline (Illustrator), Williamson Publishing (Corporate Author) – The kids will not be bored with this exciting summer book filled with thrills and fun, from face painting to backyard fun this amazing book will keep them occupied until the first day back to school.

Trekking on a Trail: Hiking Activities for Kids by Fran Lee, Linda White-This amazing summer fun book is not only perfect for those hiking trips but great for the imagination right in their own backyard.  The type of food to pack and clothing to wear during a hike are just a couple of the things a kid will learn about hiking!

For more great books to keep your child busy during the summer months go to Kids Turn Central.

Written by two single moms, Andrea Engber and Leah Klungness, Ph.D., The Complete Single Mother offers first hand tips on how to make your single motherhood journey as smooth as humanly possible.  Throughout the book they answer some of the most complex and difficult questions about single motherhood.  They touch on important issues such as how to handle divorce, creating and maintaining a budget, what to do when your children experience separation anxiety and other issues mothers experience.

One of my favorite sections in the book discusses how to pursue your own goals while managing a household.  This section allowed me to follow my own dream of becoming a writer while raising my then seven year old daughter and two year old son.  There are helpful tips on how to maintain your own personal life without getting lost in the title of “mother.”

Another helpful section focuses on how to deal with household finances.  Chances are you’re not only a single mother, but a working single mother.  With only one income flowing in things tend to get tight…quickly.  This book gives you tips on how to create a budget, cut corners without cutting quality and get the most bang out of your buck.

I found the book helpful.  Life is challenging enough without additional drama.  Many people see single motherhood as unnecessary drama.  They may fault the mother for bringing a child into this world without what they consider to be a stable family.   I know first hand the challenges of being a single mother.   Even if I could, there isn’t a thing I would change about my decision.

While it may be better to some for both parents to be in the household, I feel that it’s the quality of the home that determines the success of ones’ parenting, not the quantity.  Do not feel  shame in being a single mother; you are more appreciated than you know.

You may have become a single mother by chance, by choice or by fate.  We all have underlying insecurities.  After all, “mother” isn’t a title you carry for eighteen years and nine months.  It’s a lifetime commitment.  That in itself is a huge pill to swallow.

The book is encouraging. With a little guidance, some support and the knowledge to back up your decisions you can make your single motherhood journey much more enjoyable.  Now pat yourself on the back!  You’ve done great this far!  Keep going!

Where to start.  Seeing the news today that Michael Jackson was transported to the hospital for cardiac arrest made my heart sink.  I couldn’t peel myself away from the computer; I just kept refreshing news websites in hopes of news, good news, about  his condition.  Nothing prepared me for the news of his passing.

Although I never knew Michael Jackson personally, he was a huge part of my life.  To me, he was amazing.  As a child, nothing was more mesmerizing than seeing him perform.  I cannot count the number of times my brother, sister and I played the “Thriller” album over and over and over again.

I remember my dad dragging me out of an electronics store because I was “hypnotized” watching the “Beat It” video.  Even now, I can feel the excitement when at 7 years old my mother told me we were going to see him perform.  I couldn’t sleep that night and wouldn’t let anyone else sleep either.

His music spanned decades and generations.  No other artist could debut music videos on primetime television with whole families eagerly watching.  There are very few artists whose music can jump start a party the way Michael’s can.

In 1983, if you were watching Motown 25, then you know that night time stood still when Michael for the first time performed his most famous dance,”The Moonwalk.”  Tonight, time is standing still at the loss of such a phenomenal talent and spirit.

He was more than an Icon, he was a living legend.  Rest in peace Michael, We Love You.

Michael Joseph Jackson – August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009

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Billboard Magazine estimates that Michael Jackson’s estate has generated at least $1B in revenues since his death on June 25, 2009.  According to Billboard, “Music sales including album sales and digital downloads, account for $429 million and sales from film and television, including the concert film This Is It, totaled $392 million.  Billboard estimates revenue from licensing and touring at $35 million, while recording contract revenue reached $31 million based on a recent deal between Sony Music Entertainment and the Jackson estate to release 10 Jackson albums through 2017.”

___________________________________________________________

[Flaimahmy Reprint from June 26, 2009 of Oxford University Speech, March 2001 by Michael Jackson]

(From www.allmichaeljackson.com)

Thank you, thank you dear friends, from the bottom of my heart, for such a loving and spirited welcome, and thank you, Mr President, for your kind invitation to me which I am so honoured to accept. I also want to express a special thanks to you Shmuley, who for 11 years served as Rabbi here at Oxford. You and I have been working so hard to form Heal the Kids, as well as writing our book about childlike qualities, and in all of our efforts you have been such a supportive and loving friend. And I would also like to thank Toba Friedman, our director of operations at Heal the Kids, who is returning tonight to the alma mater where she served as a Marshall scholar, as well as Marilyn Piels, another central member of our Heal the Kids team.

I am humbled to be lecturing in a place that has previously been filled by such notable figures as Mother Theresa, Albert Einstein, Ronald Reagan, Robert Kennedy and Malcolm X. I’ve even heard that Kermit the Frog has made an appearance here, and I’ve always felt a kinship with Kermit’s message that it’s not easy being green. I’m sure he didn’t find it any easier being up here than I do!

As I looked around Oxford today, I couldn’t help but be aware of the majesty and grandeur of this great institution, not to mention the brilliance of the great and gifted minds that have roamed these streets for centuries. The walls of Oxford have not only housed the greatest philosophical and scientific geniuses – they have also ushered forth some of the most cherished creators of children’s literature, from J.R.R. Tolkien to CS Lewis. Today I was allowed to hobble into the dining hall in Christ Church to see Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland immortalised in the stained glass windows. And even one of my own fellow Americans, the beloved Dr Seuss graced these halls and then went on to leave his mark on the imaginations of millions of children throughout the world.

I suppose I should start by listing my qualifications to speak before you this evening. Friends, I do not claim to have the academic expertise of other speakers who have addressed this hall, just as they could lay little claim at being adept at the moonwalk – and you know, Einstein in particular was really TERRIBLE at that.

But I do have a claim to having experienced more places and cultures than most people will ever see. Human knowledge consists not only of libraries of parchment and ink – it is also comprised of the volumes of knowledge that are written on the human heart, chiselled on the human soul, and engraved on the human psyche. And friends, I have encountered so much in this relatively short life of mine that I still cannot believe I am only 42. I often tell Shmuley that in soul years I’m sure that I’m at least 80 – and tonight I even walk like I’m 80! So please harken to my message, because what I have to tell you tonight can bring healing to humanity and healing to our planet.

Through the grace of God, I have been fortunate to have achieved many of my artistic and professional aspirations realized early in my lifetime. But these, friends are accomplishments, and accomplishments alone are not synonymous with who I am. Indeed, the cheery five-year-old who belted out Rockin’ Robin and Ben to adoring crowds was not indicative of the boy behind the smile.

Tonight, I come before you less as an icon of pop (whatever that means anyway), and more as an icon of a generation, a generation that no longer knows what it means to be children.

All of us are products of our childhood. But I am the product of a lack of a childhood, an absence of that precious and wondrous age when we frolic playfully without a care in the world, basking in the adoration of parents and relatives, where our biggest concern is studying for that big spelling test come Monday morning.

Those of you who are familiar with the Jackson Five know that I began performing at the tender age of five and that ever since then, I haven’t stopped dancing or singing. But while performing and making music undoubtedly remain as some of my greatest joys, when I was young I wanted more than anything else to be a typical little boy. I wanted to build tree houses, have water balloon fights, and play hide and seek with my friends. But fate had it otherwise and all I could do was envy the laughter and playtime that seemed to be going on all around me.

There was no respite from my professional life. But on Sundays I would go Pioneering, the term used for the missionary work that Jehovah’s Witnesses do. And it was then that I was able to see the magic of other people’s childhood.

Since I was already a celebrity, I would have to don a disguise of fat suit, wig, beard and glasses and we would spend the day in the suburbs of Southern California, going door-to-door or making the rounds of shopping malls, distributing our Watchtower magazine. I loved to set foot in all those regular suburban houses and catch sight of the shag rugs and La-Z-Boy armchairs with kids playing Monopoly and grandmas baby-sitting and all those wonderful, ordinary and starry scenes of everyday life. Many, I know, would argue that these things seem like no big deal. But to me they were mesmerising.

I used to think that I was unique in feeling that I was without a childhood. I believed that indeed there were only a handful with whom I could share those feelings. When I recently met with Shirley Temple Black, the great child star of the 1930s and 40s, we said nothing to each other at first, we simply cried together, for she could share a pain with me that only others like my close friends Elizabeth Taylor and McCauley Culkin know.

I do not tell you this to gain your sympathy but to impress upon you my first important point : It is not just Hollywood child stars that have suffered from a non-existent childhood. Today, it’s a universal calamity, a global catastrophe. Childhood has become the great casualty of modern-day living. All around us we are producing scores of kids who have not had the joy, who have not been accorded the right, who have not been allowed the freedom, or knowing what it’s like to be a kid.

Today children are constantly encouraged to grow up faster, as if this period known as childhood is a burdensome stage, to be endured and ushered through, as swiftly as possible. And on that subject, I am certainly one of the world’s greatest experts.

Ours is a generation that has witnessed the abrogation of the parent-child covenant. Psychologists are publishing libraries of books detailing the destructive effects of denying one’s children the unconditional love that is so necessary to the healthy development of their minds and character. And because of all the neglect, too many of our kids have, essentially, to raise themselves. They are growing more distant from their parents, grandparents and other family members, as all around us the indestructible bond that once glued together the generations, unravels.

This violation has bred a new generation, Generation O let us call it, that has now picked up the torch from Generation X. The O stands for a generation that has everything on the outside – wealth, success, fancy clothing and fancy cars, but an aching emptiness on the inside. That cavity in our chests, that barrenness at our core, that void in our centre is the place where the heart once beat and which love once occupied.

And it’s not just the kids who are suffering. It’s the parents as well. For the more we cultivate little-adults in kids’-bodies, the more removed we ourselves become from our own child-like qualities, and there is so much about being a child that is worth retaining in adult life.

Love, ladies and gentlemen, is the human family’s most precious legacy, its richest bequest, its golden inheritance. And it is a treasure that is handed down from one generation to another. Previous ages may not have had the wealth we enjoy. Their houses may have lacked electricity, and they squeezed their many kids into small homes without central heating. But those homes had no darkness, nor were they cold. They were lit bright with the glow of love and they were warmed snugly by the very heat of the human heart. Parents, undistracted by the lust for luxury and status, accorded their children primacy in their lives.

As you all know, our two countries broke from each other over what Thomas Jefferson referred to as “certain inalienable rights”. And while we Americans and British might dispute the justice of his claims, what has never been in dispute is that children have certain inalienable rights, and the gradual erosion of those rights has led to scores of children worldwide being denied the joys and security of childhood.

I would therefore like to propose tonight that we install in every home a Children’s Universal Bill of Rights, the tenets of which are:

1. The right to be loved without having to earn it

2. The right to be protected, without having to deserve it

3. The right to feel valuable, even if you came into the world with nothing

4. The right to be listened to without having to be interesting

5. The right to be read a bedtime story, without having to compete with the evening news

6. The right to an education without having to dodge bullets at schools

7. The right to be thought of as adorable – (even if you have a face that only a mother could love).

Friends, the foundation of all human knowledge, the beginning of human consciousness, must be that each and every one of us is an object of love. Before you know if you have red hair or brown, before you know if you are black or white, before you know of what religion you are a part, you have to know that you are loved.

About twelve years ago, when I was just about to start my Bad tour, a little boy came with his parents to visit me at home in California. He was dying of cancer and he told me how much he loved my music and me. His parents told me that he wasn’t going to live, that any day he could just go, and I said to him: “Look, I am going to be coming to your town in Kansas to open my tour in three months. I want you to come to the show. I am going to give you this jacket that I wore in one of my videos.” His eyes lit up and he said: “You are gonna GIVE it to me?” I said “Yeah, but you have to promise that you will wear it to the show.” I was trying to make him hold on. I said: “When you come to the show I want to see you in this jacket and in this glove” and I gave him one of my rhinestone gloves – and I never usually give the rhinestone gloves away. And he was just in heaven.

But maybe he was too close to heaven, because when I came to his town, he had already died, and they had buried him in the glove and jacket. He was just 10 years old. God knows, I know, that he tried his best to hold on. But at least when he died, he knew that he was loved, not only by his parents, but even by me, a near stranger, I also loved him. And with all of that love he knew that he didn’t come into this world alone, and he certainly didn’t leave it alone.

If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything that happens in between can he dealt with. A professor may degrade you, but you will not feel degraded, a boss may crush you, but you will not be crushed, a corporate gladiator might vanquish you, but you will still triumph. How could any of them truly prevail in pulling you down? For you know that you are an object worthy of love. The rest is just packaging.

But if you don’t have that memory of being loved, you are condemned to search the world for something to fill you up. But no matter how much money you make or how famous you become, you will still fell empty. What you are really searching for is unconditional love, unqualified acceptance. And that was the one thing that was denied to you at birth.

Friends, let me paint a picture for you. Here is a typical day in America – six youths under the age of 20 will commit suicide, 12 children under the age of 20 will die from firearms – remember this is a DAY, not a year – 399 kids will be arrested for drug abuse, 1,352 babies will be born to teen mothers. This is happening in one of the richest, most developed countries in the history of the world.

Yes, in my country there is an epidemic of violence that parallels no other industrialised nation. These are the ways young people in America express their hurt and their anger. But don’t think that there is not the same pain and anguish among their counterparts in the United Kingdom. Studies in this country show that every single hour, three teenagers in the UK inflict harm upon themselves, often by cutting or burning their bodies or taking an overdose. This is how they have chosen to cope with the pain of neglect and emotional agony.

In Britain, as many as 20% of families will only sit down and have dinner together once a year. Once a year! And what about the time-honoured tradition of reading your kid a bedtime story? Research from the 1980s showed that children who are read to, had far greater literacy and significantly outperformed their peers at school. And yet, less than 33% of British children ages two to eight have a regular bedtime story read to them. You may not think much of that until you take into account that 75% of their parents DID have that bedtime story when they were that age.

Clearly, we do not have to ask ourselves where all of this pain, anger and violent behaviour comes from. It is self-evident that children are thundering against the neglect, quaking against the indifference and crying out just to be noticed. The various child protection agencies in the US say that millions of children are victims of maltreatment in the form of neglect, in the average year. Yes, neglect. In rich homes, privileged homes, wired to the hilt with every electronic gadget. Homes where parents come home, but they’re not really home, because their heads are still at the office. And their kids? Well, their kids just make do with whatever emotional crumbs they get. And you don’t get much from endless TV, computer games and videos.

These hard, cold numbers which for me, wrench the soul and shake the spirit, should indicate to you why I have devoted so much of my time and resources into making our new Heal the Kids initiative a colossal success.

Our goal is simple – to recreate the parent/child bond, renew its promise and light the way forward for all the beautiful children who are destined one day to walk this earth.

But since this is my first public lecture, and you have so warmly welcomed me into your hearts, I feel that I want to tell you more. We each have our own story, and in that sense statistics can become personal.

They say that parenting is like dancing. You take one step, your child takes another. I have discovered that getting parents to re-dedicate themselves to their children is only half the story. The other half is preparing the children to re-accept their parents.

When I was very young I remember that we had this crazy mutt of a dog named “Black Girl,” a mix of wolf and retriever. Not only wasn’t she much of a guard dog, she was such a scared and nervous thing that it is a wonder she did not pass out every time a truck rumbled by, or a thunderstorm swept through Indiana. My sister Janet and I gave that dog so much love, but we never really won back the sense of trust that had been stolen from her by her previous owner. We knew he used to beat her. We didn’t know with what. But whatever it was, it was enough to suck the spirit right out of that dog.

A lot of kids today are hurt puppies who have weaned themselves off the need for love. They couldn’t care less about their parents. Left to their own devices, they cherish their independence. They have moved on and have left their parents behind.

Then there are the far worse cases of children who harbour animosity and resentment toward their parents, so that any overture that their parents might undertake would be thrown forcefully back in their face.

Tonight, I don’t want any of us to make this mistake. That’s why I’m calling upon all the world’s children – beginning with all of us here tonight – to forgive our parents, if we felt neglected. Forgive them and teach them how to love again.

You probably weren’t surprised to hear that I did not have an idyllic childhood. The strain and tension that exists in my relationship with my own father is well documented. My father is a tough man and he pushed my brothers and me hard, from the earliest age, to be the best performers we could be.

He had great difficulty showing affection. He never really told me he loved me. And he never really complimented me either. If I did a great show, he would tell me it was a good show. And if I did an OK show, he told me it was a lousy show.

He seemed intent, above all else, on making us a commercial success. And at that he was more than adept. My father was a managerial genius and my brothers and I owe our professional success, in no small measure, to the forceful way that he pushed us. He trained me as a showman and under his guidance I couldn’t miss a step.

But what I really wanted was a Dad. I wanted a father who showed me love. And my father never did that. He never said I love you while looking me straight in the eye, he never played a game with me. He never gave me a piggyback ride, he never threw a pillow at me, or a water balloon.

But I remember once when I was about four years old, there was a little carnival and he picked me up and put me on a pony. It was a tiny gesture, probably something he forgot five minutes later. But because of that moment I have this special place in my heart for him. Because that’s how kids are, the little things mean so much to them and for me, that one moment meant everything. I only experienced it that one time, but it made me feel really good, about him and the world.

But now I am a father myself, and one day I was thinking about my own children, Prince and Paris and how I wanted them to think of me when they grow up. To be sure, I would like them to remember how I always wanted them with me wherever I went, how I always tried to put them before everything else. But there are also challenges in their lives. Because my kids are stalked by paparazzi, they can’t always go to a park or a movie with me.

So what if they grow older and resent me, and how my choices impacted their youth? Why weren’t we given an average childhood like all the other kids, they might ask? And at that moment I pray that my children will give me the benefit of the doubt. That they will say to themselves: “Our daddy did the best he could, given the unique circumstances that he faced. He may not have been perfect, but he was a warm and decent man, who tried to give us all the love in the world.”

I hope that they will always focus on the positive things, on the sacrifices I willingly made for them, and not criticise the things they had to give up, or the errors I’ve made, and will certainly continue to make, in raising them. For we have all been someone’s child, and we know that despite the very best of plans and efforts, mistakes will always occur. That’s just being human.

And when I think about this, of how I hope that my children will not judge me unkindly, and will forgive my shortcomings, I am forced to think of my own father and despite my earlier denials, I am forced to admit that me must have loved me. He did love me, and I know that.

There were little things that showed it. When I was a kid I had a real sweet tooth – we all did. My favourite food was glazed doughnuts and my father knew that. So every few weeks I would come downstairs in the morning and there on the kitchen counter was a bag of glazed doughnuts – no note, no explanation – just the doughnuts. It was like Santa Claus.

Sometimes I would think about staying up late at night, so I could see him leave them there, but just like with Santa Claus, I didn’t want to ruin the magic for fear that he would never do it again. My father had to leave them secretly at night, so as no one might catch him with his guard down. He was scared of human emotion, he didn’t understand it or know how to deal with it. But he did know doughnuts.

And when I allow the floodgates to open up, there are other memories that come rushing back, memories of other tiny gestures, however imperfect, that showed that he did what he could. So tonight, rather than focusing on what my father didn’t do, I want to focus on all the things he did do and on his own personal challenges. I want to stop judging him.

I have started reflecting on the fact that my father grew up in the South, in a very poor family. He came of age during the Depression and his own father, who struggled to feed his children, showed little affection towards his family and raised my father and his siblings with an iron fist. Who could have imagined what it was like to grow up a poor black man in the South, robbed of dignity, bereft of hope, struggling to become a man in a world that saw my father as subordinate. I was the first black artist to be played on MTV and I remember how big a deal it was even then. And that was in the 80s!

My father moved to Indiana and had a large family of his own, working long hours in the steel mills, work that kills the lungs and humbles the spirit, all to support his family. Is it any wonder that he found it difficult to expose his feelings? Is it any mystery that he hardened his heart, that he raised the emotional ramparts? And most of all, is it any wonder why he pushed his sons so hard to succeed as performers, so that they could be saved from what he knew to be a life of indignity and poverty?

I have begun to see that even my father’s harshness was a kind of love, an imperfect love, to be sure, but love nonetheless. He pushed me because he loved me. Because he wanted no man ever to look down at his offspring.

And now with time, rather than bitterness, I feel blessing. In the place of anger, I have found absolution. And in the place of revenge I have found reconciliation. And my initial fury has slowly given way to forgiveness.

Almost a decade ago, I founded a charity called Heal the World. The title was something I felt inside me. Little did I know, as Shmuley later pointed out, that those two words form the cornerstone of Old Testament prophecy. Do I really believe that we can heal this world, that is riddled with war and genocide, even today? And do I really think that we can heal our children, the same children who can enter their schools with guns and hatred and shoot down their classmates, like they did at Columbine? Or children who can beat a defenceless toddler to death, like the tragic story of Jamie Bulger? Of course I do, or I wouldn’t be here tonight.

But it all begins with forgiveness, because to heal the world, we first have to heal ourselves. And to heal the kids, we first have to heal the child within, each and every one of us. As an adult, and as a parent, I realise that I cannot be a whole human being, nor a parent capable of unconditional love, until I put to rest the ghosts of my own childhood.

And that’s what I’m asking all of us to do tonight. Live up to the fifth of the Ten Commandments. Honour your parents by not judging them. Give them the benefit of the doubt.

That is why I want to forgive my father and to stop judging him. I want to forgive my father, because I want a father, and this is the only one that I’ve got. I want the weight of my past lifted from my shoulders and I want to be free to step into a new relationship with my father, for the rest of my life, unhindered by the goblins of the past.

In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.

To all of you tonight who feel let down by your parents, I ask you to let down your disappointment. To all of you tonight who feel cheated by your fathers or mothers, I ask you not to cheat yourself further. And to all of you who wish to push your parents away, I ask you to extend you hand to them instead. I am asking you, I am asking myself, to give our parents the gift of unconditional love, so that they too may learn how to love from us, their children. So that love will finally be restored to a desolate and lonely world.

Shmuley once mentioned to me an ancient Biblical prophecy which says that a new world and a new time would come, when “the hearts of the parents would be restored through the hearts of their children”. My friends, we are that world, we are those children.

Mahatma Gandhi said: “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Tonight, be strong. Beyond being strong, rise to the greatest challenge of all – to restore that broken covenant. We must all overcome whatever crippling effects our childhoods may have had on our lives and in the words of Jesse Jackson, forgive each other, redeem each other and move on.

This call for forgiveness may not result in Oprah moments the world over, with thousands of children making up with their parents, but it will at least be a start, and we’ll all be so much happier as a result.

And so ladies and gentlemen, I conclude my remarks tonight with faith, joy and excitement.

From this day forward, may a new song be heard.

Let that new song be the sound of children laughing.

Let that new song be the sound of children playing.

Let that new song be the sound of children singing.

And let that new song be the sound of parents listening.

Together, let us create a symphony of hearts, marvelling at the miracle of our children and basking in the beauty of love.

Let us heal the world and blight its pain.

And may we all make beautiful music together.

God bless you, and I love you.

Michael Joseph Jackson – August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009

With summer movies rolling out soon, I already am eagerly awaiting the release of some cool new films.  Without a Carrie Bradshaw in sight, here are my picks for summer fun entertainment.

A no-chick flick guide to summer movies

My Blast from-the-Past Pick: “The A-Team”

Why: The ‘80s TV show hits the big screen.  With classic characters Hannibal Smith and Mr. T, the show’s mix of shoot-up, explosion scenes (where nobody was ever seriously hurt) and crazy catch-phrases always held my attention in my younger years. Plot: Bradley Cooper and Liam Neeson lead the team of Iraqi war veterans trying to clear their names after being framed for a crime.  Release date: June 11

My Stupid Comedy Pick: “Grown Ups”

Why: Either you love Adam Sandler comedies or you don’t and I do. Though it doesn’t look like it’s in the league of  The Wedding Singer and Happy Gilmore, the film will fit in as an evening escape with my husband for a date night.  Plot: Sandler is joined by Kevin James, Chris Rock, Rob Schneider and David Spade for this comedy about friends who reunite to remember their old basketball coach.  Release date: June 25

My Family Fun Pick: “Despicable Me”

Why: With a summer of family film sequels (Shrek Forever After, Toy Story 3 and Cats and Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore) it is refreshing to find a unique 3-D animated family movie among the summer releases.  Funny man Steve Carell and “SNL” alum Kristen Wiig lend their voices to the flick.  Plot: Gru’s (Carrell) plan to steal the moon is thwarted by three orphaned little girls who see him as a potential father figure. Release date: July 9

My Sci-Fi Thriller Pick: “Inception”

Why: Leonardo DiCaprio leads the cast of this Christopher Nolan film.  I caught the trailer months ago in the theater and knew I wanted to see it right away.  The plot has been surrounded by secrecy, which makes the mystery-lover in me want to see it all the more.  Plot: DiCaprio’s character enters people’s dreams to alter information. Release date: July 16

My Gory Horror Pick: “Piranha 3D”

Why: With the tagline “What do they really eat?” this horror movie is set to be cheesy à la Lake Placid and Deep Blue Sea, which featured a killer alligator and shark respectively, but that’s what makes it a pick for me.  Blending in 3-D technology ups its ranking as a total summer escape flick.  Plot: Elisabeth Shue and Jerry O’Connell fight prehistoric man-eating fish set free from an underwater tremor.  Release date: August 27

For me, summer and movies go hand-in-hand.  Despite the pervasiveness of Netflix and Redbox, a trip to the theater is well worth it as nothing brings back more teen memories than the smells of over-buttered popcorn and chocolate Milk Duds.

The franchise, which began with the release of Twilight the novel in 2005, has raked in many millions in book sales, movie sales and merchandise that seems to take on every form including cardboard cut-outs of Edward and Jacob.  The books and movies fall into the categories of young adult, fantasy, romance and a touch of horror. While expected to ignite a firestorm amongst teenage girls, the movies and books have crossed many boundaries and draw in fans from all walks of life.

The vampire aspect of the series uniquely captures and personifies teenage angst perfectly.  The themes of isolation, issues of acceptance and choices that could affect the characters’ entire futures all play out elegantly and realistically, despite the vampire/werewolf component.  This delicate balance between the real world problems of young adults and the mysterious underworld of vampires and werewolves makes eclipse and the previous Twilight movies appealing across several genres.

The setting  also plays a role in the mass appeal and sure success of eclipse.  With scenes depicting the dark, fog-laden forest and the hot and steamy peaks of pines reaching through the backdrop, themes of isolation are even more personified.

This installment of the Twilight saga picks up where New Moon left off.  Bella’s graduation is fast approaching and she must make important decisions about her future, as any teen must at that point.  She also re-evaluates her relationship with both Edward and Jacob, keeping Team Jacob and Team Edward supporters on their toes yet again.

Bella, a self proclaimed “danger magnet” is again the source of blood thirsty vampire vengeance.  An alarming amount of unexplained killings intrigues and concerns the resident vampire clan and werewolf pack.  Victoria, vampire nemesis of the past installments, has created a vampire army of sorts who are hell bent on destroying the mortal Bella.  One scene artfully and frighteningly shows the soldier vampires ascending from the water and slowly branching out into the forest to complete their mission of revenge.

As the date nears for release, the fans are reaching a fever pitch.  Newcomers to the series and those who have been under a rock the last few years and have no idea of the premise of the books will find the film to be a worthwhile way to spend a summer evening.  The scenery, slow motion, electric and haunting soundtrack and subtle sexual undertones of longing and lust will please any crowd.

Hailing from New York City and having tickled the ivories since the age of four, Lady Gaga has unleashed energy and had tongues wagging whenever she walked into a room since she was a child.  While some have looked down on her outrageous and at times, in her childhood, inappropriate behavior, she has never ceased to be herself. Her outstanding creativity and ability to make whatever she dreams a reality has made her a household name.  Love her, feel oddly confused by her, or downright despise her catchy grooves and unique outfits, you can’t help but want to see more.

She has sold over 10 million albums worldwide.  No one can deny her talent.  Unlike many of her contemporaries who churn out dance tunes which are forgotten before the lights even come on in the club, Lady Gaga writes all of her own lyrics, plays an exquisite piano and creates her own melodies.  She is a true artist and her summer concert will reflect that.  You can expect to hear amazing renditions of her latest hits, “Telephone,” “Love Game,” “Just Dance,” “Paparazzi” and “Poker Face” amongst others.

The theatrics behind The Monster Ball Tour are as impressive as the voice that will radiate from the stage.  Lady Gaga and others describe The Monster Ball Tour as more of a musical rather than a concert.  There are intricate costumes, many designed by Lady Gaga herself and backdrops that make the entire event eye candy that really satisfies the appetite.  Fan reviews so far all cite pure amazement.  Many critics also hail the summer tour as being on the level of the legendary, boat rocking, controversial, musical genius and inspiring goddess, Madonna.  Without a doubt, The Monster Ball Tour will be one more notch of success for Lady Gaga.

Just like a small child, Jonathan Livingston Seagull believed in the magic.  That magic fills our children’s imaginations, telling them that all things are possible.  Young children dream; they imagine and they create freely, uninhibited by what is or by what should be.  They create by what is exciting, what is fascinating, what is adventuresome, daring and whimsical.  Their free spirits take them to a place where all things are possible, a place where dreams come true and fantasy becomes reality. Bears can talk, mountains can move, dogs can sing and alligators can dance.

The arts allow our children to enter that world of make-believe and they believe in the magic of that world.  Encouraging our children’s artistic efforts is important.  Not only does it allow them to express themselves but it gives them confidence and helps to promote their self-esteem.  It doesn’t matter if the grass in their picture is red, yellow, or green.  Neither does it matter if the cow is pink and the alligator is red – they are expressing themselves – and they believe in the magical world that they create.

Their inner spirit is their inspiration and each child has something different to say, something different to express.  We do not want them to be the same; that’s what makes them unique; that’s what makes them so very special.

Encouraging your child’s artistic efforts is just as important as encouraging them to get good grades or to make the team.  Drawing, painting, writing, singing, dancing and playing a musical instrument are activities that let them be “them.”  That free spirit that is inside has a chance to show itself, to shine brightly as it creates wonderful artwork that only a child can create.

These activities can also become a family activity.  Together you can paint or stencil a border or mural on a wall.  You can write and illustrate a story together, make birthday presents for friends and grandparents, or go to the park to sketch.  The opportunities to create are endless and there truly are brave knights, princess’s gliding through secret forests, dragons, mystery and adventure.  All you have to do is close your eyes and believe in the magic…just like your children.